Here are some questions that help you to understand what I mean by: 'super-responsible.'
For more about Super-Responsible read what John Sandford said about Parental Inversion in: Transformation of the Inner Man by John and Paula Sandford. Theirs is the origin of my concept of Super-Responsible although I have developed the concept in my own way. If a majority of these statements describe you then this may be your primary personality schema. Looking back at childhood was there lack of safety in your childhood family? Was either parent out of order, out of control emotionally? Were your parents fighting in ways that you felt unsafe or insecure? Did you step in in some way to provide family stability? (Peacekeeper, go between, etc.) Was there enough love and security that you could be playful, expressive and spontaneous? Were you seen as a young well-behaved adult? Do your friends find you to be a 'serious' person? Do you find it hard to be a child in adulthood? (Be playful, expressive, spontaneous) Do you negate or ignore your own needs? Are you good at being there for others and meet their needs? Are you very self critical? Live with an inner judge?
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Consider your time and money as the costs you may need to consider the cost of separation and divorce. These include:
Cost for children:
Christian Marriage Intensive (Retreat):
Intensive Christian Marriage Counselling involves 4 90 minute sessions per day. A mini-retreat involves 2 90 minute session per day. A 'Christian marriage retreat' lasts for 2 to 5 days. To save on total costs the intensive Christian marriage retreat is held at my professional office in Mississauga which is 20 minutes for the Pearson International Airport. Christian Marriage Retreat Intensive A Christian marriage retreat involves 4 sessions (six hours per day) as well as informal times for coffee breaks or shared meals together. A typical day can run from 10:00 AM to 5:00 PM with lunch break and coffee breaks along the way. In a 'retreat' the informal time is often as productive as the formal sessions. Fee is $720 per day based on 90 minute session rate of $180.00. I am an experienced therapist who has specialized in life transformation and attachment-focused couple therapy. Individual counselling sessions, and marriage therapy sessions, are provided in person by George at the Life Transformation Group office in Mississauga, Ontario, Canada. (#123 1454 Dundas Street East). The advantage to you of working with an experienced therapist is that therapy skills, insight and discernment get honed over time. As a result you save time, get more benefit from every session. You can be more confident that you will achieve your goals. Training for this work, I worked in the Psychology Department of a major psychiatric facility in Alberta (4 years at Alberta Hospital Ponoka) before attending graduate school at University of Calgary. George graduated with a Masters of Science in Clinical Psychology. I have received training in the treatment modalities of: psychodrama, Transactional Analysis, crisis counselling, Positive Parenting, Reality Therapy, Neuropsychology, family systems marriage counselling, Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, and Coherence Therapy. To allow deeper work with feelings I make use of The Journey by Brandon Bays. My current focus in Inner healing is Christian Listening Prayer Therapy based on the work of Leanne Payne, John Regier and Dr. Ed Smith. I have been a teacher and writer putting his content on the web site: HealMylife.com. See my articles here. I use transformation therapy George focuses on effective methods to create changes in core beliefs, personality patterns and identity. These methods are now enhanced by the newest work in Psychology on memory reconsolidation. The theory of memory reconsolidation shows therapists how to be effective in producing lasting change. Using effective psychotherapy combined with listening prayer to get at core beliefs, I have developed a unique style of therapy that is effective in providing permanent life change in brief framework therapy for both Christians and nonChristians, for individuals and couples. Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy
The framework of emotionally-focused couple therapy is attachment issues and bonding. Couples intuitively know that a good emotional connection is key to their relationship. This approach is fully compatible with biblical language such as 'cling to your wife.'
I make use of methods and perspectives gained from the following schools:
How is Listening Prayer Used?
In listening prayer we make use of Jesus as our source of Truth. We listening for guidance. We listen for godly truth to replace our childhood beliefs and perspectives locked into out childhood memories. God's word spoken to us rapidly dispels unhealthy core beliefs and heals our memories. Heart Forgiveness As we listen to him, after having inviting His presence into those memories, our perspective changes, our heart attitude changes. We gain a new heart as the emotional wound is healed by His loving presence and truth. This is true inner healing. An immediate result is heart-felt forgiveness, for only as Jesus heals our life can our heart forgive. Inner Radiance As our heart is healed, as our heart forgives we are also reconciled with God. As our heart makes peace with God then the flow of life, love, wisdom and courage flow from God's Spirit into and through our spirit and radiates form our person. As life radiates from our person the Kingdom of God comes into place around us. Everyone with us is effected in a positive way. Flowing with Life When your heart is healed by Jesus, and life is flowing through you, then your prayers are answered and people are attracted to the life radiating from you. Does this sound like a different kind of Christianity? Well that helps explain what I mean when I say I am a different kind of Christian. What is it like to have a session with George?
Listening: I track with clients. I proved a safe space for them to express who they are. I provide a safe place for clients to find their voice, to discover and express their identity. I provide a secure place for clients who are confused about their lives and feel like they are in a nervous breakdown. Love: Clients often say that the most helpful aspect of sessions with me is love. Why is that? I explain it like this: 1. I put all me effort into listening to and understanding my client. I do that in every session. 2. I convey respect for people and treat them fairly. 3. I have shed any tendency to judge, or be superior to others. 4. I have no need to control others, tell them what they should do or to prescribe their life choices. Spiritual Guidance: My therapy includes the element of one's relationship with God. At times we deal with guilt and forgiveness. Your relationship with God expressed in your way and on Respect for your religious feelings and beliefs. Your feelings about God can always be put on the table in a session with me without experiencing any religious attitude and moral superiority from me. I am always and consistently your therapist. I am not in the role of priest or pastor. Nothing ever contradicts my love, respect, listening and understanding of you as my client.your terms. Christian Counsellor: I am a different kind of Christian. I have shed much of my 'church' doctrine or denominational identity. I identify as Christian because of a deep interest, respect and life commitment to Jesus as the Way, the Truth and the Life but in a non-religious way. I do not look for simple formula answers in the Bible. I study the Bible to know Jesus, his principles and his life. Sense of Humour: Yes sessions with George do at times involve laughter. What if you found a coach who is a good listening and encourager, an expert at understanding your problems and a therapist who can find the way past your struggles? That is what you get when you turn to an experienced clinician to be your life coach.
Perhaps you are recovering from several traumatic events. Understanding of resilience means I can help you cope with trauma without going into major depression. You may be doing well at your profession but realize that People Pleasing is holding you back. People have found help when they turned to George fas a recognized expert with People Pleasing. You may feel your life is not holding together and things are falling apart. George is an expert in the 'positive' breakdown as a time of breaking free from old personality patterns. He can coach you through this process into your new more authentic self. Find yourself too often as the Rescuer in relationships? You are successful in your career but in intimate relationships you always connect with the wrong one. George is an expert at the Super-Responsible pattern and can be you life coach in dealing with boundary confusion and other issues. I have been blessed to have a breadth of mentors who were pioneers in the understanding of prayer for physical and emotional issues in the last century.
I am privileged to have cut me teeth on 'The Healing Light,' by Agnes Sanford, which launched me into a very active model of prayer, an example of inner healing and the active use of imagination in prayer. This foundation moved me light years ahead of the liberal church background I came from. I read books and then attended weeklong trainings with John and Paula Sandford when they taught in Alberta and later Stratford, Ontario. I began to teach lay people with weekly seminars based on a series of the Sandford books: Level One was Restoring the Christian Family, Level Two was Transformation of the Inner Man and Level Three in two parts on Healing the Wounded Spirit. These teaching were mainly done in the 1990's with my associate Don Blair when we had Mississauga Christian Counselling Service. I attended a Pastoral Care Ministry conference with Leanne Payne. I caught the power of listening prayer from that conference and read Leanne Payne's books on the subject. I spent a week in Colorado to learn from John Regier. He used pointed listening to God to break through core beliefs in a couple. He had to be very careful how he worded that because his audience had been taught that God does not speak today to his people. In 1999, by attended a series of workshops by Art Zieltra, I was introduced the work of Dr. Ed Smith called Theophostic. His was a more complete theory, practice and demonstrated practice of listening prayer guided by the Holy Spirit to key beliefs which were rapidly unlocked by God's truth (revealed word of God). This consolidated everything I had learned about listening prayer. Even better Rev. Zielstra demonstrated the practice. This immediately began to shift my practice of prayer therapy. I felt like I had been given the final piece of the puzzle. It is at this point that I began to write. I had found my voice! I founded Agape Christian Counselling in 1991 and launched the website www.HealMyLife.com in 2001. Now there are more than 150 articles posted at Healmylife.com and others on www.Listening-Prayer.com - the platform for articles about prayer. I draw on the insights of John and Paula Sandford especially into relationship principles, sin patterns, character patterns and the function of the human spirit. With many years of drawing on these in my counselling practice and through doing the seminars on the material I am thoroughly conversant in these principles. Effective application came as a grasped the method of listening prayer. I observed that Listening for God's truth when the emotions and the memory were activated was always effective in triggering some permanent level of healing of emotional learning. Core beliefs were being replaced with God's perspective. I discerned that this could be the basis for transforming personality issues as everything had a foundation in our emotional learned perspectives and beliefs. The very core of our self - our identity - could be touched by God and healed. This would be a fulfillment of I recently joined with a group of therapists who wanted support in building their practices. We launched the Life Transformation Group and did peer supervision. The blessing was that it gave me enough hours to be accepted in the newly formed College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario. I was equipped with tools that provide inner healing through listening prayer therapy. However my professional development on psychotherapy now complements prayer therapy. I can now provide permanent life transformation with secular tools using Coherence Therapy. Coherence Therapy is a form of depth-oriented brief therapy that allows the client to discover the core issues driving symptoms and uses proven methods to trigger an edit of core beliefs within the emotional brain. Coherence Therapy works along with the new psychological understanding called 'Memory Reconsolidation' for a non-religious psychotherapy. I am deeply rooted in and passionate about prayer therapy. Using the principles of prayer therapy is very important to me and applied whenever I can because inner healing prayer therapy can be very effective and permanent in changes wrought. It introduces people to a more intimate and meditative relationship with Jesus. |
AuthorGeorge Hartwell M.Sc. Christian Marriage Counsellor, Phone sessions available, fee $120 per hour. Archives
July 2018
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